This is our couch, or rather loveseat, that is going the way of the dodo tomorrow, having been replaced by a more streamlined model that can seat more people. Or one person lying down without legs dangling over the armrests.
I hate its oversized nature, the space it takes up, the fact that this couch existed in the house before me and I did not help pick it out (petty, but true).
This couch has seen so much.
Some abjectly awful: I spent bedrest on this couch, desperately hoping to keep a pregnancy that didn't want to stay; I took the call that my HCG levels had dropped significantly on this couch, and wailed so loudly while curled up on it that a friend who was dropping off orchid food could hear me from her car and chose not to make her presence known.
Some hopeful but with more than a shadow of sadness: heating my butt from progesterone shots that I'd hoped would help us get to our baby; sitting on it while I razored out pages from magazines for the Baby Binder, the backdrop for hopeful photos of us waiting jokily impatiently for our first adoption shoot; sitting and talking about our hopes and dreams and realities during our first homestudy, and then our renewal last summer. We've had a lot of heavy conversations on this couch.
But it's also the couch we sat on where we first said "I love you," forever ago. It's the couch we spend Luddite Nights on, and where we spent Earth Hour by candlelight while I read aloud "The Call of Chthulu" as Bryce was real sick at the time. There's been canoodling on this couch, and snuggling up while we read together -- there's romance steeped in it, too.
There's so much history to this couch, but it's time for a new start, new memories that hopefully have a balance of a lot less pain and a lot more joy.
(I didn't realize you could write a whole post about a couch until I read Mel's post... thanks for the inspiration!)
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Oh yeah. We hold onto things because of the memories that we have associated with them. But sometimes these are painful memories that we don't need to be reminded of all the time. I was reading your last post yesterday. The hospital/clinic bracelets? Yup I held onto them. But then I asked myself why? Why hold onto the objects for the painful past? The past already lives in my memory and I don't need to be reminded of how we have failed these cycles. Anyhow, very proud of you for all the progress you have made these past two weeks including getting new furniture. I can't wait to "meet" your new couch!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I am excited for something new that hasn't seen so much sadness. I feel the same about our new kitchen--those counters have never seen an injection mixed or drawn, never had rubbing alcohol poured on them to sterilize the surface. It's glorious. I don't know why we hold on to those bracelets, it's such a strange relic, but it is lovely to have them freed and I'm glad yours are free, too. Or rather we are free from them. :)
DeleteLOL! I love it! Funny, I wrote a post about our couch three years ago - I wonder if it's one of those topics that inevitably ends up becoming blog material. Have fun making new, positive memories on your new piece of furniture!
ReplyDeleteIt makes sense in a way, right? You spend so much time on certain pieces of furniture, and they see so much of your life in their own lifetimes. I am excited for the change, and the ability to seat more people! A little scared of the lighter fabric and the impact of my hyper cat, but you gotta live, right?
DeleteI hope onto objects like this too. There's so much good wrapped up in the bad. And everything in between. And though we're not suppose to identify with objects, we do.
ReplyDeleteFairwell Loveseat. Sending you on with love.
You spend a lot of time on these things, right? They infiltrate your life and see so much. It's still here though, until the chairs come in JUNE... Bryce is having a harder time saying goodbye to it than I thought. Change is hard.
DeleteI love this farewell to your old couch, acknowledging that life, in all its ups and downs, has occurred on it. I hope we get to see the new one too!
ReplyDeleteYes! I will post the new one when I get my new throw pillow that I was excited to find. :) It is quite lovely and I love how it has transformed our living room. That's true, life has certainly occurred on that loveseat. I am looking forward to the life the new couch will see.
DeleteI so get attaching feelings to inanimate objects! The loveseat has served you well and has been there for the good and the bad, but it's time has come.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to "meeting" the new couch and following along as you create new memories on it!
Yes, I agree! It's time has definitely come. This couch is symbolic for Bryce too which makes it hard, because it was the first piece of furniture he bought by himself after his first marriage ended... so that's bittersweet, too. Yes! New couch, new memories.
DeleteI love this. Adios to the loveseat. Hola to the new couch and the post that will be written eventually to honor that piece.
ReplyDeleteAdios, loveseat! Exactly. I am Hola'ing the new couch and Bryce continues to sit on the Loveseat until we get the chairs... although my one cat is finding the nubbly texture of the new couch to be irresistible as a scratching surface. Sigh. New post coming when my fun new throw pillow comes...
DeleteIt does look like a love seat... two-seaters are highly impractical though. I love chucking stuff out - sling it and get a huge new one, despite the memories (I'm feeling very unsentimental today it seems..).
ReplyDeleteYes! Especially super deep two-seaters. Takes up so much space and fits only two people...makes zero sense to me. New one, new memories -- blank slate for our future, I say. Nothing unsentimental about that!
DeleteMay the new couch be full of anticipation, of expectation of good things to come...Can a couch be a sponge for feelings? I think it can. Stretch out...
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely a sponge for feelings, I believe that totally. Yes, good things for the new couch, and what comes next.
DeleteThis is such a cool commentary on your old couch. We still have (in the basement) the love seat that was in my husbands apartment when we were dating. It's seen a lot too. Your story also reminded me that recently we took a bunch of old sheets and blankets to the dump (to be recycled). One was an old afghan that we would cuddle under on the couch. It had holes, I don't know where it came from and I never really liked it, but I felt weird and sad for a few hours after it was gone. I don't know if it is real regret at getting rid of it or I just associate it with feelings of comfort. Anyway, I hope you live your new couch and it brings happiness and relaxation to your home!
ReplyDeleteThat makes total sense! Anything that was once comforting is hard to let go of. What a beautiful, bittersweet story. I am looking forward to the comfort the new couch will bring. I am loving it already...Bryce is trying to figure out a way to save the old loveseat and put it in his office so it's not goodbye forever. Yes to happiness and relaxation!
DeleteWho would have thought that reading about a couch would be so endearing? I love your love seat tribute!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! It deserved a tribute even though it will stay with us until the chairs come, and then maybe find a new home at Bryce's office, if we can figure out how to get the behemoth out there. That thing is huge! The new couch is lovely though and fits right where I wanted it. To new memories!
DeleteLoved this post! You can get strangely attached to furniture, even when you know it doesn't quite fit your lifestyle anymore. I'm glad you are getting something new that's more to your liking & the life you want to be living. :)
ReplyDeleteWe got rid of our old sofa & loveseat shortly after we moved into our condo last year, and got a new sofa & a leather recliner. The old stuff was not that old, less than 10 years & still in great condition, but the colours were wrong for our new place & there really wasn't enough room for both the couch AND the loveseat (& dh had been hankering after a recliner for eons). So the sofa went to the thrift store & BIL took the loveseat for his mancave. ;)