Follow me on the crazy, hopeful, discouraging, funny, and ultimately successful (one way or another) path to parenthood while facing infertility.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Apparently My House Was Built By Hobbits

So, after last weekend where we made tremendous headway in getting our downstairs in order so that we can reorder our upstairs, I was feeling incredibly accomplished. I was more than a little smug when I thought, We have this IN THE BAG.

And then we decided that this weekend we would order our crib, our dresser, our crib mattress, and our glider. Doable, right?

Or... not. The glider is proving to be challenging, to say the least.

We had a glider that we loved from the giant baby superstore. Except then we found out that it was a) a 12 week lead time, and b) over $600. Both not feasible. However, we also discovered (when I did my fancy-schmancy little graph paper art project) that the glider was 36 x 36 x 38 in dimension... and so IT WOULD NOT FIT THROUGH THE NURSERY DOOR.

Enter one of my school secretaries, who is incredibly resourceful. I mentioned that we have the nook upstairs, and she was like, "PUT THE GLIDER IN THE NOOK." When I said it was going to be a play/reading nook, she very politely but firmly put me in my oblivious place, saying, "DON'T BE RIDICULOUS. You will not have your baby playing in the nook by the hallway by the stairs. Your baby will play on the first floor, near YOU. Your baby goes where YOU go. Your nook is the perfect place for your glider and a bottle station, so you don't lose your mind in the middle of the night. Put the damn glider in the nook." Brilliant. True. Didn't think that one through, just thought of magazine stuff that doesn't necessarily echo reality. So... glider in nook.

Which is great, because the nook is 66" wide by 62" deep, so it should fit that glider, right? We just had to find a less expensive one.

So we did, by the same manufacturer, Litt.le Cast.le, which we love for two reasons: it's made in the U.S.A., and it's made with baby details in mind. Namely, the arms are 2" taller so that you can more easily hold your baby when feeding without arm fatigue. Plus the fabrics are gorgeous. The one we found on Tar.get.com was a pattern we liked, shippable to our home, and at a much more reasonable price.

And then we rejoiced because my mother-in-law offered to purchase the glider for us... which is huge. A big help, for sure. It's more expensive than the crib.

Except.

Today, we did some measurements.

I realize that our home was built in 1934, and that life was different then.

But were people MINIATURE? Did they buy TINY TINY DOLLHOUSE STYLE furniture? Because the measurements just DID NOT MAKE SENSE. Like, at all.

Our staircase is 31" wide. Except when you get to the landing at the top, and then it magically shrinks to 30" on the diagonal. Then the hallway, before you get to the magical expansive nook, is 31" wide. It's a good thing we don't want to put the glider in the nursery... because the doorway is 29" wide from jamb to jamb.

Did I mention the newer, less price glider is smaller? But still 35" wide by 35" deep? And 75 pounds? AND DEFINITELY WON'T FIT UP THE STAIRS? Oh, and that our front door width is 34.5"?

Did a hobbit build our house? Did people previously just assemble furniture in the room and then never ever move it? Or was everything just built tinier?

I was moved to either tears or fury this morning, when we discovered this reality. Probably a healthy mix of both, actually. I think at one point I screamed,

"It's this HOUSE! This HOUSE doesn't want us to have BABIES!"

I felt defeated. Here I am, envisioning this beautiful nursery space, and slapped with the reality that our nursery is 91 sq feet and so my vision needs some shrinking pills a la Alice in Wonderland, and that our staircase is not conducive to pretty much anything. It was sobering. It filled me with sadness. It made me want to hit and kick things.

We did manage to make it to the lovely local baby furniture store, though, and talk things out with the extraordinarily helpful staff. This is where we discovered that the dresser that went with the convertible crib we originally wanted comes assembled. And won't fit up our stairs.

However, it is also where we discovered that some gliders come in two pieces, and WILL fit up the stairs. Except most of those gliders were at least $150 more than what the Ta.rget one was, minus the ottoman, and in the case of one floor model, plus a giant scary spider. Seriously... there was a GINORMOUS awful spider on this nice grey glider and when the salesman tried to smoosh it, it scurried down the glider and UP INSIDE IT. Oh hell no. All I could think when sitting in various gliders was that they were all secretly housing spider nests. It was BIG (I know because even Bryce was skeeved out)... and now it lives inside a plush reclining glider.

So, we were productive today, but only somewhat so. No glider, yet. Still figuring that out. No dresser, yet. Deciding that maybe we get one from the big red bullseye that we can assemble in the room. The tiny, tiny room. So it won't match exactly. I think at this point that's okay, although it made my eyes tear up in the store thinking about sacrificing one more thing to reality. It seems that we are constantly shaving things off of our dream, while simultaneously GETTING TO LIVE THE DREAM, in terms of prepping for a baby that is coming, at some point, but definitely coming to us. The whittling is incredibly frustrating, though.

Positive movement:

We bought a crib! We decided against the convertible crib, because our tiny little room won't support a headboard and footboard anyway. We found this completely adorable smaller crib, that does convert to a toddler bed:

So cute, right? Minus the baby-suffocating bumpers we're not to have, of course. And almost HALF the price of the other crib we considered.
We bought our wonderful chemical-free, waterproof (welded seams) mattress that flips to be softer for toddlers after the infant period is over. AND, we found a mini play yard, all mesh sides, that we can use in our bedroom for the first few months for quick response time and excellent bonding. It's by Nuna, and is the "Mini Sena" model... I think it will actually fit next to my side of the bed with space for me to get out and walk around it, which would NOT be the case with a Pack'nPlay (which is home study approved). And, because it's a play yard, it's ALSO totally approved. Because it's all mesh on the sides, so it's totally breathable... which is the key to having it be okay by the post-placement social worker. Or so we hope.

We did NOT buy our glider. We did NOT buy our dresser. My vision of the nursery is slowly coming together though...regardless.

Just because today was immensely frustrating (and then very gratifying, as we bought our crib! So exciting!), I will share with you the general color scheme and theme of our nursery... Currently it's painted Atlantic Grey, which is actually more of a robin's egg blue. I think we're going to paint it the same creamy color we painted the one wall of the dining room, so it's a little more neutral (and a lot more airy). Which will go great with the little rug we bought in SouthWest Harbor in Maine, meant to go in front of the crib:

Is this not the most adorable thing you've ever seen?

AND, this adorable hand-hooked rug happens to coincidentally match the crib bedding I bought! (I bought it because unfortunately the one I liked just happened to get discontinued by the manufacturer just about NOW, so I bought it on clearance and then bought another sheet online):

Love my Treetop Friends with the silly eyebrowed-owl... :)
See all the cuteness? I love that it has a design on the side of the sheet, so it makes you feel less sad for not having cute bumpers, since bumpers are totally pediatrician/OB nurse/adoption agency verboten. Because while they're pretty, they're  apparently baby killers. And I'd like my baby to stay alive, please. 

Things are coming together. Still some things to overcome, like getting furniture up the dollhouse steps so that our nursery area can have a glider and a dresser, but I think we are getting closer to figuring this nonsense out. The vision isn't all messed up yet, even though this morning it seemed that the nursery dream was doomed. We have our bedding, we have a crib that we can pick up as early as tomorrow, and we are figuring out the rest of the stuff. It seems like owls are the theme, but we are actually adding stuff from all sorts of woodland creatures. Owls are more prominent, but I also love me some hedgehogs, foxes, raccoons, etc.

Baby steps. I have to remember, I'm so fortunate to even be stressing about how to get this nursery together. A year ago this would seem like the farthest of pipe dreams...it's all about perspective. Although I contend that I can still be frustrated that our house seems to be ever-shrinking, and that in 1934 people must have been around 4 feet tall with furniture sized for Am.erican Girl dolls.

6 comments:

  1. It's all part of the process. Flexibility is key....When that precious baby is in your arms, all of these frustrations will fade away. Nothing else will matter. XOXO

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    1. Thanks, Mom. I think there's far more joy in this post than frustration, actually. I think it's okay to be frustrated with a small house and reinvisioning a nursery that's taken us six years to achieve; that's part of the process, too. Our process will always be a little different from the norm, even when our precious baby comes. It's important to me to put all the associated feelings out there, not just the pretty ones. It doesn't mean we're not still full of joy! :-)

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  2. It's frustrating, but one way or another you will have a beautiful little hobbit nursery in your little hobbit house. :-) The spider in the glider is just creepy though.

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    1. Thank you! It will all work out I'm sure, it's just now that it seems unsurmountable. It WILL be a little hobbit nursery! It will be like a woodland critter nursery in a hollowed out tree trunk... :) OMG, that spider. It was horrible and nightmare-inducing. Not a fan of indoor spiders.

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  3. This reminds me of the first time we put our crib together. We didn't measure (you are ahead of the game and smart there) and we put it together in the front room. When we went to move it down the hall to the nursery it cleared the hall but didn't come close to making it through the door. We took it apart and put it back together again inside the room. It was the same for our current house as well. It must be something with baby furniture haha Our recliner/rocker does come apart to two pieces or it wouldn't have fit either. I agree with other post that it is little annoying things that won't matter or bother you long term. You will find a way and that sweet little baby will make it all come together and work (even when your previous self would disagree). Enjoy following your journey still and your humorous and endearing posts :)

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    1. Oh yes -- all that baby furniture is surprisingly monstrous. Older homes have such small thresholds, and you don't even really think about it until you have to fit something through. I forgot that when we bought our leather sleeper couch for our TV room/guest room, we had to take the doors off both sliding glass doors, Bryce's office door, and the door to the TV room to get it in. AND it took five people. The furniture store's delivery people wouldn't even attempt it. :) Logically, I know long term this will seem like a distant memory and it won't really matter... I look forward to that day! To me though I feel like adjusting everything just seems like a career now. "Oh you thought you could have this? Well YOU THOUGHT WRONG." That sort of thing. I'm so glad you enjoy this crazy journey and the posts that I hope come across as more humorous than whiny! Endearing, what a beautiful compliment. Thank you so much!

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