Monday, July 24, 2017

#Microblog Mondays: Reclaiming The Butterflies

Remember this picture, so full of hope, so full of the happiness and promise of a future that never came to pass?


That is a beautiful park that is hidden away, next to and behind a volunteer firefighter station, and it's filled with butterflies of all different kinds and meadows and a pretty little stream.

And we haven't gone there since that day, because it reminded us too much of celebrating the hope and happiness that came to such a crashing halt; it reminded us that we never, ever felt quite that same way again.

Until this past weekend. We went yesterday for the first time in FIVE YEARS and made an agreement that once we left the car we wouldn't talk about adoption or our family building disaster AT ALL.

And, amazingly, we didn't.

We talked about our trip to California that is nearly upon us, we talked about the peace and quiet of the place, we pointed out tiny peepers and little snake friends and all kinds of monarchs and swallowtails and frittilaries and other as-of-yet-unidentified-by-me butterflies. I've seen so many monarchs this summer, many more than last year, and it gives me hope as I have come to identify with those beautiful fluttering transformative insects.

We took a picture, not quite in the same spot, but I think we look pretty happy and at peace.



It feels good to reclaim this space for us, to start eliminating (or at least alleviating) the dark spots of trauma and memory and replace them with new happy experiences in our new reality.

Be like a butterfly. Emerge from the goo a beautiful, soaring, fluttery thing. 

Want to read more #Microblog Mondays? Go here and enjoy!

25 comments:

  1. :) I'm glad you were able to reclaim some happy space!

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    1. Thank you! It was good to go back there under different circumstances.

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  2. Such a lovely post. I wish you many butterfly sightings in the years to come.

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  3. I'm so happy you could go back to this happy place!

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  4. I'm a great believer in reclaiming places and events and even holidays (I've reclaimed Christmas!) as part of our new reality. Brava to both of you! Lovely post and photos!

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    1. Thank you! It's funny, the first day we went there was one of the happiest days of our life together, but then how things turned out after that walk made it one of the saddest memories in a way. I'm glad we could go and not end up a morose disaster, so glad we are in a space where we can reclaim. :)

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  5. What a beautiful place. I'm glad you are making new happy memories there. Dreams and hopes can be beautiful, even the ones that eluded you. But the present, this moment in reality, is the closest thing humans can experience to heaven (CS Lewis said that, I think). I'm happy that you have the courage to embrace it.

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    1. Thank you so much, beautiful quote. Trying to enjoy reality for what it is, honor what came before, but enjoy this life we have.

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  6. Yes! Yes! It is certainly powerful to reclaim places and spaces. Making the choice to renew it and make it all your own and special in a new, surprising way!

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    1. Thank you! Yes, this was a good choice, for sure. (I don't as much appreciate the choice a guy with a dog off leash made, because the dog jumped on me and in petting it briefly I seem to have gotten a mild case of poison ivy on my hand, but that was the only downside). :)

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  7. Replies
    1. Thanks! It's one of my new favorites... :)

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  8. I do love the new photo. Though you had me suck in my breath with "snake friend." :-) I fear where there are snake friends, there are also my dreaded crickets.

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    1. Ha! Snakes are polarizing, for sure. Thanks, I love the new photo, too. And oh, yes. There are crickets galore. I suspect this park is not for you... :)

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    1. Yes! Thank you. Lots of reclaiming going on. :)

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  10. That's a lovely post. I'm so happy to hear you are doing things to heal. What a pretty spot. I love butterflies!

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    1. Thank you so much! Yes, healing healing healing. So many butterflies! Love them, too.

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  11. Onward. Congratulations on reclaiming. And oh my, butterflies.

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    1. Thank you! Yes, ONWARD. Love that.

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  12. Love that new photo! As a loss mom, butterflies have special significance for me. :) I think they're a great symbol of transformation, too... the ugly (ok, less pretty ;) ) caterpillar emerging from its cocoon as something beautiful... changed, but still the same underneath. Hope you had/are having a great vacation!!

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