I have not been a good blogger the past couple of weeks... my commenting is terrible, I am backed up on reading--I am in need of some good, quality blog reading time. It is that season of the year where I am drowning, just clawing my way to the surface of all the work I need to do for my IEP (individualized education plan) meetings with parents and students and the whole process of writing the plans for next year.
I need a new mantra, because today it was I HATE EVERYTHING. I need to turn this ship around and face it in a direction that has a little more hope for light at the end, a little more I CAN DO THIS, IT SUCKS NOW BUT IT WILL ALL GET DONE. Today, though, the first one felt more real.
I did come home (albeit at 7) to a house filled with candles and cello music and a bottle of wine on the table. I had the Five Guys, because as I said to Bryce on the phone, "Today calls for shoving grease in my face." He fixed the rest of the day with the ambiance and wine.
So I just wanted to drop in and promise that I will be back to reading and catching up when my paperwork is done, but I didn't want you to think that I have disappeared for whatever reason. Sometimes when I go missing for a bit (and really it's a very little bit so far, a week of delinquency is not terrible, right?) I fear you wonderful people will think maybe I've got a placement and can't write about it.
Nope, sorry...all I have is a mound of paperwork to dig out of and decisions as to what I should wear tomorrow for my first round of meetings. A baby would be a much nicer reason to disappear briefly.
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A week without posting is hardly delinquent! We all need a break sometimes. I regularly go through periods of just losing my blogging mojo. I hope you get it back soon once all your paperwork is done, and better, I hope you feel happier soon.
ReplyDeleteStill, coming home to wine and music and candles is pretty good. He's a keeper!
Ha! To me it feels that way. I have all these thoughts in my head and no time to get them out (AND sleep and get all my work done), so it leaves me feeling creatively constipated, if that makes any sense. Oh, yes, a million times yes -- I truly lucked out the day I crossed paths with Bryce. He's a sweetie! And I can see the light at the end of the paperwork tunnel...it's coming!
DeleteThat is the sweetest thing ever, for your hubby to provide such wonderful ambience for you to unwind after a long day. That is the best!
ReplyDeleteAgreed! It was just the best capper to a real bummer of a day. He's a sweetie for sure!
DeleteDear Jess, this "I hate everything" thing sounds a bit like me at the moment! March has been crap; everything is crap. I hate my job, my boss is a sociopath; I hate the weather (non-stop rain for two weeks); I hate my tiny house on its noisy road; I've got major writer's block on the blog; I'm having awful extended family woes; I can't stay asleep for more than 2-3 hours. I having one of those run-down misery fests that I hope will just wear off soon. Anyway you sound genuinely busy not just self-indulgently miserable like me. Good luck with it all and this too shall pass, as they say. (Nah me neither)
ReplyDeleteThis week sort of has continued in that vein, although yesterday was a strange combination of really bad and really good. Sometimes that I hate everything mode just needs to get out there and blow, so you can get back to living more things. I hope things look up for you!
DeleteWow! What a happy thing at home after a day long work. Don't worry - get done with you papers and plans and you will see us around. :)
ReplyDeleteIt was incredibly happy! Great way to end a terrible, exhausting day. I hope to be back soon!
DeleteDang! Sorry to hear you've been swamped with all the yuck, but so happy that Bryce came to the rescue! What a wicked awesomesauce thing for him to do! Reminds me, I used to have a mixed tape called, "FTW" (nope, not, "for the win" - the second two words are, "the world" *grin*). Wish I could remember what songs were on it, so I could recreate the playlist! Sending lots of good thoughts your way.
ReplyDeleteThat playlist sounds amazing!!! And yeah, Bryce is pretty awesomesauce. I'm a lucky lady.
DeleteYikes! That sounds like a painful process! I hope you can come up for air real soon, for your own sanity. And also...your voice is missed😀
ReplyDeleteOh, thank you... On all counts! Just a lot of paperwork and preparation, but when they are all done it's such a lightening of the load. Something to look forward to!
DeleteCandles, music, wine, and Five Guys -- sounds perfect!! ;) I think we all go through these lulls in our blogging & reading/commenting... and that goes for me too lately. Be kind to yourself!
ReplyDeleteIt was quite the romantic end to a real shit day. Thanks for the reminder to be kind to myself...I just miss you guys!
DeleteSending energy for getting through those meetings. We'll all be here when you get back.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I hope to be back soon although it seems things conspire against me, like a giant wind storm that took out power (we have it) and Internet (we don't), but it will still all get done... Somehow!
DeleteYou will get back to your blog and reading and commenting all in good time. A break every now and again is good, especially if swamped with work in another area of your life. Teaching in special education takes a ton of organization and work. Honestly, the daunting mountain of paperwork involved with IEP's are what deterred me most from considering teaching special education. Kudos to you and others who chose your teaching field! I have the utmost respect!!
ReplyDeleteI miss this, though! We had a crazy wind storm and lost internet so I'm trying to comment on my phone... Which I don't like. I'm hoping to be done with paperwork by this weekend. Yup, lots of paperwork, lots of meetings... Such is special ed!
DeleteI know that too much to do feeling! (I pretty much have it all the time; but varying levels of intensity. Hmmmm, I need to write narrative report cards soon.....you remind me. But offsite forms first and behaviour support plan updates first hahaha. Wondering though: why do you write next years plans so early? I can't predict next month.....I would have no idea how to write a plan for next year! I imagine it's not in your control....just curious about the rationale.
ReplyDeleteYes, so much paperwork! It's all district dependent... Our annual review cycle starts in early March. It does feel so early because a lot can happen between now and June, but we have to discuss programs for next year and transition to the 9th grade building and so all the moving parts whirr early. I also usually sign to for the earlier dates because I never know when/if I'm going out on maternity leave, so if just as soon get it all done myself than risk leaving it to someone who doesn't know my kids. However I've been operating this way for so many years it is getting hard to plan to not be there and STILL BE THERE. But, that's just how this cookie crumbles!
DeleteSo sweet of Bryce! I'm totally in favor of pizza by candlelight! :)
ReplyDeleteI figure when you have good news that you can share, you'll let us know. In the meantime, you have a very demanding and very important job. Keep rocking it!!
Isn't he the best? It was burgers and greasy, greasy fries, too, so that really can't be beat. Managed to complete all but one of my IEPs today on a day off thanks to the wind storm that blew my area apart yesterday, thanks to Bryce's office because our internet was out until an hour or two ago. I will try to rock it to death and then enjoy the bejeezus out of April break and Summer!
DeleteMmmm Five Guys and wine sounds amazing right now. Don't worry about the lack of posting. We all have real lives and jobs and sometimes we just can't (or don't want to) post. We'll wait for you! :-)
ReplyDelete