Well, it would appear the digital stick was right.
It's definitely a no.
I have to say, peeing on a stick Sunday took a little of the sting out of today, but not a lot. I was still hoping that this time would be different. I am still feeling incredibly rejected and like a freak. Why won't babies stick to me? What the hell?
BUT, they have a crazy plan in the works. I think they called it a Conversion Cycle? Anyone heard of this? It was "borrowed" from another fancypants clinic that collaborates with mine.
Basically, you go on the Pill once a period comes (I am actively willing it to come any second now... The power of Period compels you! Now that I know you suck, the least you could do is bleed when I want you to!). Then, you start a stim cycle. YUP, A STIM CYCLE. Because stim cycles produce better, plusher linings. So there will be follistim in my near future... yay. Then they trigger you and you do a transfer according to a normal calendar, but with your body having done a lot of the prep in a quasi-natural way. They've had some great success with it with implantation failure people apparently (why I'm just hearing about it now is interesting though).
So more shots. More driving an hour and fifteen minutes each way, more missed school, more feeling fat and fluffy, more wear and tear and my poor body. Not a whole lot of downtime to go nuts and get some of this PIO flub off me, but there was a groupon for the gym I used to belong to for a 2-month membership. Maybe it's kismet. Maybe I can make this work. I just keep thinking, my poor body.
Baby, you are so loved and I wish you would just figure out how to get to us. We are working so hard to bring you home, I just wish I knew the secret. It's not lack of love, dedication, or sacrifice. That's for damn sure.
On to the next adventure.