tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post8424482652434945550..comments2023-11-19T21:42:17.901-08:00Comments on My Path to Mommyhood: Did We Put Ourselves In This Position?Jesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-79441391502111317242015-11-17T04:12:31.880-08:002015-11-17T04:12:31.880-08:00There is no right answer, and I am so sorry that y...There is no right answer, and I am so sorry that you are facing this. Love you. Amanda Prescotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11709979610638621806noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-61537435361819336742015-11-16T18:44:52.873-08:002015-11-16T18:44:52.873-08:00It's so true that life is not safe, that there...It's so true that life is not safe, that there are so many ways that you can be put in a quagmire. I feel like we're deep in the muck and looking for just the right stick to haul us out, but we'll always be covered in a thin layer of muck. I am a control freak, admittedly, so I like to think that I tried SO HARD to anticipate all outcomes, and we have the t-charts and tree diagrams to prove all our hard work planning the unplannable. :) We are slowly discussing our way into options that we can live with... here's hoping they are actually viable options. Thanks for the support and the love!Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-70921067052204783062015-11-16T18:42:54.114-08:002015-11-16T18:42:54.114-08:00Feel free to add the ectopic info either here or o...Feel free to add the ectopic info either here or on my microblog post... I would love to hear more since it wasn't really explained in detail to me at the time and was presented as "less than 1% chance" that that could happen. Insanity. I don't know if this came up in your information, but the celia on my right tube was pointing the wrong way, so maybe it was a baby sucker? Or maybe I just wanted to blame that part of my anatomy? :) Thank you for your thoughts. To be fair to our friend, it was a one-off statement that wasn't followed by any further discussion and I don't feel like I owe him an explanation, I felt like I wanted to explore that line of thinking for my own self. To look at our choices and how we got to this impossible situation that we tried so hard to prevent. Thanks for the support!Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-13161106454562017342015-11-16T18:40:21.294-08:002015-11-16T18:40:21.294-08:00Thanks for your commiseration... it stinks to be i...Thanks for your commiseration... it stinks to be in these positions but it's helpful to know that others "get it." I didn't feel particularly judged by the friend, but it did set off a feeling of, "How have our choices led to this moment?" that I wanted to explore. Thanks for the love, we'll figure this out sooner than later while continuing to keep those little nuggets on ice. Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-57117065683722758512015-11-16T18:37:44.559-08:002015-11-16T18:37:44.559-08:00Thanks, Charlotte... we probably will store the em...Thanks, Charlotte... we probably will store the embryos for a while, we are looking into proration as we explore embryo donation/adoption. I think coming to grips with them not getting transferred to me has been the hardest, but ripping the bandaid off that decision is freeing. I couldn't take breaks between IVF cycles that were too long for this reason too--I hated delaying the inevitable. Thanks for your hugs!Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-69195858473068946332015-11-16T10:12:16.567-08:002015-11-16T10:12:16.567-08:00Oh Jess. 😞 Nobody can possibly anticipate everyth...Oh Jess. 😞 Nobody can possibly anticipate everything that will happen, every single circumstance that can lead to an ethical dilemma. Your friend is right that if one chooses not to to do IVF, one will not face these decisions that you do. But his beliefs may someday put him in other dilemmas that you won't necessarily face. Life is not safe. I hope you continue to work thruogh this.torthúilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07738803052167620020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-25583996786677268152015-11-15T20:49:05.093-08:002015-11-15T20:49:05.093-08:00Yes, I agree with A about the judgy friend. You do...Yes, I agree with A about the judgy friend. You don't need to justify how you got to this situation to anyone. I hope that time will give you the answers you need.<br /><br />PS. I know about ectopics (volunteered on an ectopic site for six years), so if you want a brief explanation of how you can have IVF and an ectopic (it happens), feel free to email me. Or I can add it here - I just don't want to take over the post which is about something else.Malihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03928262526502319303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-30263286612219230342015-11-15T12:45:52.865-08:002015-11-15T12:45:52.865-08:00Oh boy, that is a conundrum with no easy solution....Oh boy, that is a conundrum with no easy solution. Screw the judgy religious friend, tho. You came at this with the best of intentions, and it's your moral compunction that leaves you with a dilemma, whereas others would feel little attachment to embryos and might discard them more easily. I can certainly identify with the "ghostly Bermuda triangle" sentiment and the ponderous what-now questions hovering over frozen embryos. The 'frozen' factor, fortunately, gives you time to make a decision you can live with in the long-term while some clarity of perspective (hopefully) reveals itself. XOA. (The Empress and the Fool)https://www.blogger.com/profile/12811582715346428693noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998166587816121679.post-67283690451864872052015-11-15T07:31:08.284-08:002015-11-15T07:31:08.284-08:00Oh, Jess. I am so sorry. Truly. I don't have a...Oh, Jess. I am so sorry. Truly. I don't have any good advice, except to continue to search your heart and don't make a decision until you feel at peace with it. As you have realized, the further away from a situation you get, the more clarity seems to happen. Take your time making a decision. My initial feeling is to leave the embryos for the time being, because maybe your choice will be different after you have brought home your baby through adoption. I know storing the embryos is costly, but for peace of heart might be worth it. Sending prayers to you to help in this decision. Many hugs.Charlottehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08987444437659867827noreply@blogger.com